Lost Logic
by Sora Means Sky
Summary: Artemis feels terrible after something he does and looses his logic long enough to do something terrible. *Time Paradox Spoilers* Written/Uploaded while half-dilusional from being sick. I'm not responsible for the contents of this story.


Artemis couldn't believe this. He couldn't believe what he was doing. He was lying to _Holly._ Holly was one of the few people close to him, one he trusted, one he respected, one he wanted respect from. It cut him; it cut him bad to do this to Holly.

'_It's for mother,' _he thought to himself as the words poured from his lips. Those words which accused, no, were the "truth" that Holly had given Spelltropy to Angeline Fowl. Artemis' dug his nails into the palm of his hand. _'It's terribly ironic,' _Artemis' thoughts continued. _'That lemur that would save my mother, I killed in attempts to save my father.'_

His accusation was finished, put the pressure on his palm failed to cease. Artemis almost felt as if he deserved to be hurt for what the pain he had just caused Holly. _'That path is NOT a possibility. I looked into that, many, many years ago. The repercussions are worse then the temporary results…'_

'_Holly believed me, that's what counts for now. Nothing else… I can make it up to her later…' _Artemis left these thoughts behind and focused on what was directly in front of him; getting ready to save his mother. No1 was going to be there soon and then things would come out well… he prayed.

Sadly, Artemis' hopes were not fulfilled and things turned worse then he would of hoped. In fact, they were a good bit worse. Currently Holly was driving a shuttle (quite erratically) and Artemis was sitting in the co-pilot sit while Mulch rummaging around the shuttle, looking for anything of value.

Artemis had told Holly that he had lied to her about how his mother, Angeline, had contracted Spelltropsy. Needless to say, Holly was furious and that had led to the rough piloting. Artemis was clinging onto the arm rests of his seat. Holly let up a little and Artemis took this time to rush to the bathroom, an idea popping into his head. His heart beat faster. For this slight bit of time, he had lost control of his own logic. What a rarity. His heart beat faster.

Closing and locking the door, Artemis began shuffling around, searching for something. His heart beat faster. He wasn't quite sure what he was looking for, but had a rough idea. His heart beat faster. Unluckily, he found what he was looking for. His heart beat faster.

Quickly he tore the thing he had found apart, throwing most of it upon the floor, taking only one slender, shiny piece of metal, dropping everything else. His heart beat faster. Artemis kicked the toilet seat down. His heart beat faster. The room was sound proof after all. He sat on the cold porcelain (it had been a leading LEP member's back in the day and his crew had had it installed as a prank. The member owning the shuttle never bothered getting it replaced, saying it worked just as well as the higher tech ones). His heart beat faster.

Artemis yanked his sleeve up (his heart beat faster), and without thinking, lightly dragged the sharp edge of the piece of metal across his arm. His heart beat faster. It was in fact a razor blade and the rest of the actual razor was lying on the ground. Artemis froze. His heart beat faster. In a shock and in awe at what he had done, his heart started beating faster then it had before. His brain started catching up to his heart.

'_NO!' _was his first coherent thought. _'No, no, no, no! This is not me! This is not Artemis Fowl!'_

'_Which one?' _His thoughts taunted back to him.

'_The old one. No, the new one! No the old! No both!'_

'_It can't be both. It's either one or the other. To me the answer is clear. This kind of stuff belongs to the new Artemis, not the old one.'_

Artemis sat there, staring at his lower arm as a thin line of blood appeared over where he had cut. _'It'll scare for a couple months,'_ he thought. _'I only grazed my arm, really. And the blade is plenty sharp, so, it won't scar as bad.'_

But really these thoughts were only to keep Artemis from committing this crime again. But it was oh, so, so, hard! If only he could rationalize this…

'_This is punishment for lying to Holly! This can make it up to her! She'll forgive me! And as an apology to Mother!' _Artemis thought all in a rush.

He lowered the razor blade two more times at angles, making an asterisk mark, the first cut being the horizontal mark. A light grin passed over Artemis' face as he debated on whether or not to make any more marks. _'Another light one, and then a deeper one,' _Artemis decided.

Artemis made a diagonal line under the asterisk. Artemis took a deep breath as his heart and stomach started fluttering. He pressed the blade into his arm and held it for a few more seconds then he had the other. Artemis removed the now bloody blade and put it on the edge of the sink. _'I probably should of sterilized the blade and cleaned my arm beforehand,' _Artemis though as an after thought. With a slight shrug, Artemis stood up and walked over to the sink.

He stared at his arm with its five bloody cuts. He noticed that the deeper one was bleeding more heavily then the other four light ones. _'Logical'_ he thought as he turned the sink on and started running the water. He turned the hot side on and waited for the cold water to warm up. He gently washed his arm under the water, knowing cold water would only make the cuts bleed more. They stung. Every cut stung terribly. It took a good bit of will power to not move his arm out of the water. _'No soap,' _Artemis thought as he started patting dry the still bleeding cuts. _'D'Arvit,' _he mentally swore. The blood had slowed a good bit.

Artemis wadded up some toilet paper and put them over the cuts. He walked over to the bathroom door and opened it a crack. **"Mulch?" **Artemis asked through the crack.

"**What?" **Mulch shouted back from where he was looking in a compartment. Holly was still driving erratically as ever.

"**Can I borrow your Medi-Kit?"**

"**Why?" **Mulch demanded.

"**I cut myself on the corner of one of the compartment doors in here," **Artemis lied. It was one thing he was good at and that he hardly screwed up at.

"**Alright," **said Mulch without a second though. He threw the white container over to Artemis. It landed on the floor where Artemis quickly scooped it up and quickly retreated back into the bathroom.

Artemis flipped the lid open and soon found some antiseptic along with some cotton balls. Nothing real high tech. It seemed to be a pick of a human first aid kit and an elf medi kit. Artemis pulled his sleeve back up and threw the bloody toilet paper in the toilet. Over the sink, he poured the antiseptic onto the cotton ball and then brushed the cotton ball over his various cuts. _'D'Arvit.' _It stung. He quickly finished cleaning the cuts and threw the bloody cotton ball in the toilet as well.

Artemis found some bandages and quickly wrapped his arm from wrist to elbow, covering everything by using a double, and in some places, triple layer. After using some medical tape to tape it in place, Artemis put everything back in the kit where he had found it. He then left the bathroom, forgetting to flush the toilet, feeling well after completing such a crime. He'd wait until the perfect time before telling Holly that his debt had been repaid.


End file.
